Kindness

I just wanted to say a big thank you to everyone for their kind thoughts and words over the last week. It has really meant a lot to me to hear from all of you, and to know I have such wonderful friends. I mean, I knew had wonderful friends - but it can still be overwhelming, so thank you!

I've been trying to think of how to sum the trip up, and there's just no quick way to it. It was a long and depressing trip. The weather was lousy, we both got terribly sick, and the government made everything take longer than necessary. However, I did get to spend some quality time with my Danish cousins and great aunt. On the last day, we did get everything we set out to do accomplished. And I think my mom has closure, which is the only reason we went.

Funny things that happened on the way (or in) to Copenhagen:

• My mom's coworkers gave her a sympathy card which included $1000 for travelling. Unbelievably sweet.
• Mom got totally sloshed on her anxiety pills - many funny stories, and I will be mocking her for months.
• Movies on the plane: Balls of Fury, Rush Hour 3, and The Game Plan. It was like the trifecta of worst in-flight movies ever. And add Hairspray to that for the flight back. Horrible!
• FYI -The American Embassy in Copenhagen is only open from 2-4 pm, Monday-Friday. So, don't need anything unless it's during those hours. They'll just tell you "it's past hours."
• My cousin, Michael, introduced me to a hilarious BBC Show called Nighty Night
• Flu-fig-new-ber, or at least that's what I'm calling it since that's what it sounded like in Danish. Yummy chocolate treat!
• Children, children everywhere. Michael, I think they're following you.

Unexpected

My mom's mother passed away this week. We just found out today. I guess most people would call their mom's mother their grandma, but that seems inappropriate for this relationship. I didn't know my mom's mother. I wager to say that no one really did, at least not in a real sense. I know that my mother tried. I know she loved her with all her heart as a child, and watched as it was broken repeatedly by the one person that is supposed to love you from the start.

And yet this unexpected news of her death has us all thinking. For my mother, did she try hard enough to forge a relationship with her mother? The answer, yes. She did the best she could with what she was given, and in this case she wasn't given much. For myself (and I assume my sister), what was she like? What made her do, say and act the awful way she did? How can you be a mother, and yet have no sense of feeling for others let alone your own child? Are we like her at all, even a smidgen? Could things have been different? What if we could have called her grandma with pride? We are left with too many what if's.

Instead, my mom and I fly out to Copenhagen Friday to sort through what was and to close the book on what if's. My grandmother passed away alone in her apartment and wasn't found for days. It's the saddest and loneliest thing I can imagine, and yet also the most fitting.

Lax

Happy belated New Year all! I have been remiss in posting this year because I don't really have anything delightfully funny or interesting to say...yet. However, I do have lots of random grumblings to share, and who am I not to complain?!

• 200: So, at Starbucks today the guy behind me ordered his drink and then specified that it needed to be at least 200 degrees. How f*ing pretentious is that? First, how do you even know it's less than 200 degrees when you get the drink? Secondly, how are you even drinking that coffee at specified temperature without burning your tongue? I swear, if I worked at Starbucks I would have totally heated it to 197 just to mess with him!
• Kids + Coffee: While I'm talking about coffee, what's up with folks buying their kids coffee? Does anyone else think that's odd? I mean, does your 6 year old really need his java fix? Doesn't caffeine stunt your growth anyway, or is that just another lie my parents used to tell me?

On a positive note, I had a great Christmas. My parents LOVED the Wii, and it was so much fun playing it with them. They are still playing daily! My mom is now a "professional" bowler, and apparently my dad is pissed that she's beating him (since he actually used to be on a league). It was great to spend time with the family, and eat so much food! My pants are barely fitting, as scheduled. In fact, today I split the inner lining in my pants - not a good sign. Luckily, my colon cleanse arrived today. Perfect timing. I'm so excited about my 3-month cleanse. I'm sure my bum and my husband will be less excited after a few weeks. I'll keep you posted. Aren't you lucky!