Thursday, June 26, 2008

And So I Say, Good Day To You Sirs!

To the douche bags that robbed my car Sunday night/Monday morning - you suck! How dare you come on to my property and break into my car! While we're at it, what's up with the trashing of the car? Did you let a wild mongoose loose in there! And hello, you got like 15 Cd's...wahoo for you. Are Cd's even worth anything anymore? Did you earn anything from stealing from me and my neighbor? Seriously, what are you gonna get, like $40? What a profit. I'm sure it was worth the possibility of being caught and jailed.

While I thank you for not causing any permanent damage to my car, I am wishing you nothing but bad vibes for disrupting my idea of safety at my home. I want you to know that while I am a democrat, I am very republican in my view of guns. I am a proud NRA member (unless it's expired, or if it matters that I didn't change my maiden name yet...but you get the point). And I swear upon all that is holy - if you ever come on my property again and I even hear a crackle of my grass, I will shoot first and ask questions later.

And also, I will have you know that the soundtrack for the Sound of Music is a Julie Andrews and Rodgers & Hammerstein classic. I am somewhat offended that you left it behind when you rooted through my music choices. Get some culture, jack-offs!

7 comments:

Gnome said...

So Brianne put up a belly picture -- where is your's???

Beckers said...

"Shoot first and ask questions later"? Okay, pregnant women should not be allowed access to guns. ;)

Breezy said...

So I guess playing pranks on Stacy during pregnancy could be more dangerous than before...

T-ann said...

chris would be so proud of u...

Buford Betty said...

OMG first I am so sorry! But I am dying laughing over the Sound of Music soundtrack! Hahhahahha... um, I totally have it too. Oh that sucks though - it's not really the stuff that's gone, it's that feeling of being violated and someone rummaging through YOUR things. I'm so sorry.

P.S. Remind me not to piss you off.

Preppy Pink Crocodile said...

I agree with Beckers- no guns for preggos! But you have me cracking up with your Sound of Music soundtrack comment. You cute little gun toting thing!!

CRICKET said...

Cute blog, I loved one of your comments: "hormones are a bitch, and I would sure hate to slap your ass."

We have had our car rifled through several times and an actual intruder inside who stole my diaper bag. It totally sucks!