Monday, October 20, 2008

Rebuttal

Auntie Tara,
While I appreciate your point of view, I must say that I disagree with your assessment of my being, as you put it, unreasonable. I am sure that we can come to an understanding as to why I think it is a better option to wait things out. In fact, I may just stay in here as long as possible.

First off, I'm a bit wary of the US economy at this time. The housing market has crumbled, unemployment is at its highest, and the financial markets are just completely out of control. When mommy and daddy watch that irritating Mad Money show, I keep hearing him throw around the term "Great Depression 2." This does not make me feel excited about coming into the world. I do not want to wait on a bread line, even if I am in my super-chic stroller.

Then there's this whole impending election. I think at minimum, I should wait until afterwards to come out. I mean, if the McCain/Palin ticket wins, what kind of world am I inheriting? And honestly, while that Palin woman is hot with a capital H, she also scares the bejesus out of me. I mean, I read more than she does and I'm in utero - what's up with that? I think if they win, I may move to Canada with or without my parents.

Auntie Tara, I hope that helps you understand why I'm staying in as long as I can. Plus, and this is a secret between you and me, I had some construction workers and Joe the plumber in early this morning doing some remodeling. The womb is getting a bit tight, so we're thinking of getting rid of one of the kidneys, knocking down some ribs, and cutting out a bit of intestine. These changes will make it a lot more open. I'm going for an airy, New York loft feel. I hear you're good at decorating, and I'd love your opinion on the wallpaper options I've chosen.

Warmest regards,
Ben

5 comments:

CindyLooHoo said...

I am dying of laughter! That was probably the most hysterical entry I have read in a while!!!
I hope the Durham girls keep me in the phone loop when Ben does decide to make his much anticipated appearance. I can't wait to meet him!

Breezy said...

LOVE IT!

RZ said...

Ben is quite the eloquent little fetus! ;)

Stacy said...

Yes, he does like to listen to NPR for world news, watch The Daily Show & Colbert Report for his politics, and CNBC for the financial meltdown - he's quite accomplished for a 0 year old.

Anonymous said...

I never had any doubt Ben would be a genius! it's just icing on the cake he has great political views as well, hope he has his Mom's sense of humor, which by the way, she inherited from her Mom.